Go You Chicken Fat, Go!

So are you wondering, Lone Reader, how was Sharon Jones? FABULOUS! it wasn’t as good as the First Ave show I saw last year, but it was pretty dang good. I was part of the group that decided the State Fair security was a little too tight and rushed the stage. Wait, that sounds more thoughtful than it was…I got carried along by the group I was dancing with and ended up right against the stage. I loves me some Sharon Jones. And the Dap-Kings were smooth and cool and suited up like always. Super awesome, man, 4ril.

My friend left yesterday at noon. It was a really great visit. The Summit Brewing tour was very interesting – crowded for a Thursday afternoon! (Free beer and they will come…) I find that most beer tastes kind of, well, beer-y. So much for my sophisticated palate.

My wusband has informed me, with oh-so-clever-slyness that he is now aware of this blog. My mind is racing…did I say anything bad? I don’t think so. Other than pay your damn child support on time. Sigh. And now my ex-in-laws (does that make them outlaws?) are coming to town in two weeks. Buckle up, Lone Reader, it’s going to be a bumpy ride.

Since my posts have been rather, well, pedestrian lately, I offer you the following TRUE STORY from my grand adventure so long ago in East Africa:

So, to get from Nairobi, Kenya to Arusha, Tanzania took a few means of transport. One thing we had to do was walk across the border to get checked in. We ended up getting what was called a share-ride taxi to take us as far as it could toward the border. In Nairobi, what this entailed was getting our backpacks and standing outside by a taxi stand. There were about 5 mid-80s K-car kind of rides sitting around. They were waiting for enough passengers to make it worth their while. After about an hour, more people showed up and a guy said, “You two! C’mon.” We dutifully lined up next to his beater of a car. Tanya called window. Little did we know, we would not only not be by the window, but we would be sharing the ride with 4 other passengers. And two vats ominously labeled “chicken fat”. Tanya and I sat on strangers’ laps, holding heavy, greasy tubs while we slowly made our way out of Kenya. The taxi driver had one cassette – Ace of Base. He played it over and over. To this day, when I hear “All that she wants is another bay-beh…” I can smell chicken fat.

Woo-hoo! It's a big day!

Today my friend and I are going on a tour of Summit Brewing, then in the evening we're going to the State Fair to see Sharon Jones & the Dap Kings. I'm pretty damn excited. I saw a lot of live music last year and Sharon Jones was really tops - she's got a groove that is unmatched. I predict there will be frenzied dancing and droppin' it like it's hot.

I'm also going to seek out the new bacon-related foods at the fair. When one does a search for "bacon" on the Strib's interactive fair food map the following items come up, all of them new (according to the Strib...I'm not so sure about that Axel's one.) :
Axel's - Handmade tator tots made with hash browns, cheddar cheese, bacon, green onion and sour cream, deep-fried and served three on-a-stick
Big Fat Bacon - 1/3 slice of bacon fried and caramelized with maple syrup, served on a stick with dipping sauces.
Famous Dave's State Fair - Pig Lickers (chocolate-covered crisp-fried bacon pieces)

I'm definitely going to try to get the last two - tater tots do nothing for me. (I know, I'm not really a Minnesotan.) My friend has never been to the MN State Fair, so it should be a lovely time. I'll report back to you, Lone Reader, if I haven't had a coronary from the bacon!

The fanciest vet office EVER

My dog needs cataract surgery. $2,600, not including the aftercare expenses. It shoulda clued me in when we went to the clinic for the veterinary opthamologist and the counters are granite, the floor is slate and there's a copper ceiling. Dang, I wanna come back as a vet specialist in my next go 'round.

I got my books today, but I've gotta work now to pay for the surgery. More later, Lone Reader.

Clone Wars Review

I. Clone Wars wasn't horrible. It really wasn't. I was disappointed by the lack of the original Star Wars music. It reminded me of the many Law & Order spin offs - you know, you hear the music and it's just altered enough to let you know that what you are watching is actually substandard. The new girl character, Ahsoka, is pretty annoying and, in the tradition of Ewoks, seems to be a boy-franchise's way of reaching out to girls. I didn't dislike the animation, although many do, probably because it reminded me the Thunderbirds and I've seen and tolerated some really bad animation in my child-rearing days. I think it's hysterical that in a movie that features one battle after another, for the first time we hear someone call for a medic for the wounded soldiers. ("See Johnny - they care about each other.")

It did feel like a long Saturday morning cartoon. I can see that if I was a die-hard Star Wars fan it would bug. Since I'm not, and since the Star Wars fan in my life is 7, it felt just right. At least it didn't confuse me.

II. I discovered that my girlfriend who's staying here this week doesn't like bacon. I've decided to continue being her friend, but I'm watching her closely to see if she's actually part of an alien race.

just a brief note

No, I'm not dead, Lone Reader. Just dead tired.

On the plus side of things, my friend Robin is coming to visit me today! YAY! She is soo awesome it hurts. (not really) And the kids are in swimming camp - praise the Lord and pass the Coppertone. I think I'm getting my shipment from Amazon today, so I'll report on my new choices for the ol' bookshelf. And I may be going to see Clone Wars today. Wish me luck. (I'm easily confued by sci-fi...I'm guessing that the animation won't bring me any clarity either.

I also played Wii yesterday with my good friends known by the combined name of Klarla. The kids and I were invited for pizza and Wii and I must say, I'm a little bit big talk on the Wii tennis. Why are there always doubles? Why do I grunt like Monica Seles when I'm virtually serving? Why does the rain fall from up above? So many questions.

More later. (and keep those Sea Monkeys responses comin' - we're litigants on the side of right, baby!)

The Midnight Ride up North

Listen my children and you shall hear
of the night the Republicans will invade here
On the first of September in this year (naught 8)
McCain and his posse arrive in our state

Will Timmy go big time? Will Michelle land a kiss?
(If she doesn’t buss somebody, something’s amiss.)
The penultimate question – just tell me the truth
Is there enough pancake to recapture youth?

They’ll be here, Lone Reader, in four days crammed full
But I’m here to alert you (I’m dyed in-the-wool)
We’ll set up with pickets in quite a tableau
We’ll chant like our parents “Hey-hey” and “Ho-ho”

Shall we carry a banner stained by bleeding heart?
(If we’re peckish let’s get some quinoa a la carte.)
When exhausted from battle and covered in scars
even in the wee hours, we can still go to bars.

You know maybe, Lone Reader, it won’t be so bad.
Elephant hats might start a new fad.
Who am I kidding? We all know the truth.
By the dawn of next month we’ll say, “Why not Duluth?”

Nothing about Michael Phelps or the Jonas Bros

Good news:
- I got my pre-sale tickets to see Weezer at the Xcel in October!
- My girlfriend is coming to visit for a week! Woo-hoo! I predict a brewery tour, lots of laughing, crazy dancing at the Sharon Jones concert on the 21st and good food. I love her.
- I had a return to make to Amazon and found three more books I really wanted.

Bad news:
It's been an expensive day, Lone Reader. For some dude to come haul away brush cost me $180. Weezer tickets weren't cheap. I maybe ordered four books on Amazon. I met with a lawyer who charged me $100 to tell me he can't help me. Back to school shopping today...sigh. Work is crazy right now. And where is my damn child support?

No news:
I started art-making again. Okay maybe this is a little bit good news. Should I paint a tableau of my arch-nemeses, Sea Monkeys & spiders, visiting a haunted house? Maybe throw a clown in there for good measure? Or should it be a beautiful encaustic work with the pigment encased in bacon fat? So many choices...