Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Star Wars, Bad Tunes and Bacon Vodka

Final Jeopardy
Every now and then I get to watch Jeopardy, much to the chagrin of my children. Yesterday, worlds collided when the final Jeopardy question was read. I think the category was biblical geography... “In ‘Return of the Jedi’, a planet shares its name with this home of a witch who summons a spirit for Saul.” You never saw two kids get whipped into a frenzy like that, man. Something as flat out dull as Jeopardy is allowed to ask questions about kid topics? What’s next? Hannah Montana questions? “I’ll take Mac n’ Cheese for $200, Alex?” The answer was What is Endor? None of us got it right. Mainly because we’re heathens…there wasn’t enough Star Wars info in the clue for this crowd. It was pretty damn funny, though, that one contestant answered, “What is Tatooine?” Very biblical sounding.

Bad song, man
Grossest song I’ve heard on the radio in a while: Missing by Everything But The Girl. Dude, the main lyric in the song is “And I miss you…like the deserts miss the rain.” First of all, I don’t think deserts miss rain. Their defining characteristic is a lack of rain. Rain would just confuse them and leave them with no identity. Like in Memento. Secondly, the song sounds like rear. It should’ve been recorded by Sade in 1985. Ewww…

BLTinis this weekend
It seems like the BLT-inis are going to be had this weekend. The container of bacon vodka looks like it came from an evil lab: the vodka has taken on a weird cast and the bacon has all congealed into one big piece. It really looks like a specimen in formaldehyde. (Am I making you thirsty yet?) I have yet to figure out the lettuce part…perhaps an endive spear? At any rate, there will be photos and reviews of the entire spectacle.

Despite the rising temps, I cannot get warm. Am I still recovering from the opening on the weekend? I dunno. But from Brookstone (land of things no one needs) comes this ridiculous thing – a jacket that heats itself. Me, I just buy cases of handwarmers at Menards and tape them to my skin.

Happy Tuesday!

1 comment:

Ribeye said...

Okay. First of all, you're painting "Tonna's Tay" with too bland a brush. I mean, WHERE are the whimsical colors, my sweet octopusy?

Next, don't talk to me about Anything But the Girl. The fault lies in the name - the name tells you everything you need to know about this band and its pathetic, lightly misogynist fans. Word.